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Evilphd666 [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net to Chapotraphouse@hexbear.netEnglish · 2 days ago

Kelly slop - Bananas Split

theonion.com

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Kelly slop - Bananas Split

theonion.com

Evilphd666 [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net to Chapotraphouse@hexbear.netEnglish · 2 days ago
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Bananas Split
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  • Dort_Owl [they/them, any]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    skeleton-guns-akimbo explosion D I V O R C E explosion skeleton-guns-akimbo

    • RedWizard [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      2 days ago

      God I love this website

  • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    Getting laid hell yeah, go away you little brat

    • ConcreteHalloween [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      2 days ago

      I’m currently stuck living with my mom till I get a better job (hopefully 🙏) and honestly, I was happy when she got a new BF cuz getting laid puts her in a WAY better mood.

      She’s not getting drunk on wine and trauma dumping about her ex to me every other night.

      • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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        2 days ago

        Tell your mom I said congrats on the sex.

  • ElChapoDeChapo [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    I love how Kelly put himself in as Men-About-Town

  • ClathrateG [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    Any yank(I assume its US country code) tried calling the number(555 8126) on the matchbook?

    • frosty99c@midwest.social
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      2 days ago

      555 was specifically set aside as a fake area code. It’s used a lot in cartoons/TV/movies and is known that it won’t work for anything.

      • miz [any, any]@hexbear.net
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        2 days ago

        area code

        555 is the part of the number called the prefix

        • frosty99c@midwest.social
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          2 days ago

          Good catch! I didn’t know that’s what it was called. Having just looked it up, 555 as an area code and as a prefix are both not in use in the US, other than for directory assistance.

          • CthulhusIntern [he/him]@hexbear.net
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            2 days ago

            Is there some technical reason why it doesn’t work, or is it just… never assigned?

            • frosty99c@midwest.social
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              2 days ago

              They are just never assigned. I thought they were specifically set aside to be used in fiction, but it seems like that might have just been 555-01XX. But because of the association to that, no one ever wanted a 555 number for anything else and now they are all unused except for 1 number that leads to ‘directory assistance’

              https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/555_(telephone_number)

        • RedWizard [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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          2 days ago

          Then came along Tommy Tutone and fucked a whole host of phones for a good part of 30+ years.

          When we’d first get calls at 2 or 3 in the morning, my husband would answer the phone. He can’t hear too well. They’d ask for Jenny, and he’d say “Jimmy doesn’t live here any more.” … Tommy Tutone was the one who had the record. I’d like to get hold of his neck and choke him. — Lorene Burns, an Alabama householder formerly at +1-205-867-5309; she changed her number in 1982

          Read more: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/867-5309/Jenny#Popularity_and_litigation

      • ClathrateG [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        2 days ago

        Til thanks

  • ConcreteHalloween [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    Ooof this one hit home a little

    • Dort_Owl [they/them, any]@hexbear.net
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      2 days ago

      meow-hug

  • Rey_McSriff [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    So-called self-reliant kids when it’s breakfast time (11:39am):

  • Firstnamebunchofnumbers [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    This ones just sad

    • TraschcanOfIdeology [they/them, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      2 days ago

      And a bit misogynistic. Not that Kelly has great views on women, but this one feels a bit worse.

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