On the internet, people act like brands and brands act like people

If I ever come across a brand doing that quirky, faux-personal Wendy’s schtick I respond to the thread discussing their scandals, especially when they are about labor rights or the environment. Think along the lines of:

"This is such a funny comment, Coca-Cola™!

I bet that the Colombian Coca-Cola bottling plant workers who you had assassinated simply because they dared to attempt to unionize would have loved to read this comment. But I guess they can’t. Because you killed them."